Update: Giveaway has concluded. Thanks for the good times Coin Shop! It was a good run!
With the final Coin Shop games released, and us chaotically flooding the site like Walmart on a Black Friday, we grabbed our games and poured out our bags of Chrono coins.
Except for me, the next question is… Now what? I’ve been freeloading for a while, and taking advantage of all sorts of freebies from the community and from Chrono.gg. So, I figured I could try doing a giveaway myself. Problem is, I have no idea how to do a good one, so I’ve decided to do a cringeworthy job and take cover after the made up on the spot contest ends.
From the Coin Shop I am offering the following games:
Potatoman Seeks the Troof Robin Hood: The Legend of Sherwood Death Fungeon Glorkian Warrior: The Trials Of Glork Rex: Another Island Uurnog Uurnlimited X-Morph: Defense 8-Bit Hordes (Not from the Super Send-Off 'Stravaganza, but I should probably sweeten the pot a bit, so this is added.)
No Moon Hunters, because I claimed it myself as a selfish jerk.
So the way I’m going to fail at this would involve the following complicated rules:
Post here and say something nice to anyone from Chrono.gg. A compliment or thanks to anyone who is employed at Chrono Inc. and try to be a little more meaningful instead of “Thanks bro gimme freebie.” Like why did you pick this person? This includes pets, but excludes advisors/investors. (Tom Hanks/Nate? Who in the whatnow? …)
I suggest you pick somebody who reads/posts in the forums so they can actually see it.
Wait until… I don’t know? 2 weeks? 3 weeks? A month? 1 week? 57 hours? I’m too dumb to know how to set a good deadline so it’ll be whenever I feel like it, or believe there’s enough interest in here to bother closing off entries.
When this mysterious day actually comes (probably never), I will randomly pick people (I’ll assign people a number and then use a random number generator). First winner gets first pick on the list, second winner gets the next pick, etc.
(One key per winner. So the last winner is stuck with the final prize.)
I’ll post here on who won and tag them in, and that’s when the winner will post here on their choice. Then I’ll PM the Steam key.
The Steam key will be encrypted and will require you to contact me as I give you directions on where the Japanese American Ninja Warrior Rip-Off With A Slip & Slide TM obstacle course is.
You are given 5 business days to arrive at the course, where I will be waiting for you. Upon your arrival, I will officiate your attempt to pass the course as referee. The first winner of the group of first winners to complete the obstacle course will be given a USB key.
With that USB key, you are to use it on your computer, but you must contact me by Discord, where I will challenge you to Rock Paper Scissors (you must supply your own webcam and one for me as well by ordering online on Amazon to my PO Box).
After 17 consecutive wins against me in Rock Paper Scissors, I will give you the password to unlock the locked USB key, which then has an app in the USB key to decrypt the Steam key for you to enjoy your prize.
Ignore steps 4 through 7 as they have nothing to do with this giveaway and I successfully wasted your time making you read that wall of text trash.
There isn’t a Step 9…
So… Hopefully this will end well. I have no idea and I’m already preparing my couch fort to take cover in, before the impending trainwreck with random dumpster fires arrives.