DEAD BRO COOPER
We like to think that when we finally do kick the bucket and shuffle off this mortal coil, we better have a pretty baller story in mind to tell everyone who’s going to be waiting in Limbo with us. Like if you’re just old and you die of natural causes, which by the way, is like, the IDEAL way to go out in our world, what kind of status is that going to buy you compared to everyone else who’s ever died?
“Hey! Welcome! How’d you die?”
“Oh, uhhh, not to brag or anything, but old age, surrounded by loved ones in my house.”
“Oh, that’s pretty cool, I guess. Good for you.”
“Thank…you? How did YOU die?”
“Uh, uhhh…I was D.B. Cooper.”
“What? The air pirate? Are you serious?”
“Nah, I’m just screwing with you. It was Mongols.”
“Aw, what? Really?”
“Man! What? That’s still way cooler than mine!”
So yeah, in the afterlife, look out for that. And in the meantime, since we’re in no hurry towards THAT at all, why not tarry a while longer and get some practice in at it, except with cards instead of the ethereal remains of your living soul! Doesn’t that sound great! That’ll show that old air pirate…now fetch me my cardsman’s gloves! And don’t drop ‘em out the window or anything, either. It’s A Long Way Down.